The New York Times Opinion: “If you let boys be boys, they will murder their fathers and sleep with their mothers.”
When initially reading this opinion article in The New York Times it was a bit disturbing. The subject matter wasn’t disturbing it was more of that this opinion was being published in a major newspaper.
My first gut reaction is that if young teenagers or even men in their late teens through their twenties read this article, it would really mess them up. There are extremes with both male and female, but to let a few men be the generalization for the male libido being a problem is a giant stretch.
I’m sure one statement, “If you let boys be boys, they will murder their fathers and sleep with their mothers,” would be correct in a nation of 300 million but honestly is this even an issue to publish in The New York Times?
Now don’t get me wrong I think it’s fantastic that the ‘extreme’ male libido is being checked and exposed. And that women who are actually victims get a chance to set things straight. But the article goes from the few guilty to painting the many.
“Through sheer bulk, the string of revelations about men from Bill Cosby to Roger Ailes to Harvey Weinstein to Louis C.K. to Al Franken and, this week, to Charlie Rose and John Lasseter, have forced men to confront what they hate to think about most: the nature of men in general.” The New York Times
But how did this handful of powerful men exposed for their sexual aggression become the norm to place on the entire male species? Frankly, I find it repulsive.
“Almost all are uninterested or unwilling to grapple with the problem at the heart of all this: the often ugly and dangerous nature of the male libido.” The New York Times
Again the writer is making a case in point that ‘every’ male has this problem. I know plenty of passive men that are so passive the human race would be in trouble if they ended up being the breeders.
“Fear of the male libido has been the subject of myth and of fairy tale from the beginning of literature: What else were the stories of Little Red Riding Hood or Bluebeard’s Castle about? A vampire is an ancient and powerful man with an insatiable hunger for young flesh. Werewolves are men who regularly lose control of their bestial nature.” The New York Times
Yes, some men have a problem with controlling aggression. It’s called testosterone. And there’s a reason men have testosterone and women of estrogen. For thousands of years, it was up to the men to protect, hunt, and breed for the species to expand. Women were the home keepers and nurturers. Yes if you look hard enough you’ll find cases where the situation may be flipped.
“I have seen just how profoundly men don’t want to talk about their own gendered nature. In the spring, I published a male take on the fluctuations of gender and power in advanced economies; I was interviewed over 70 times by reporters from all over the world, but only three of them were men.” The New York Times
The reason it seems like males don’t want to talk about their own gendered nature is probably that some are making an issue out of something that really isn’t an issue.
“I’m not asking for male consciousness-raising groups; let’s start with a basic understanding that masculinity is a subject worth thinking about. That alone would be an immense step forward. If you want to be a civilized man, you have to consider what you are.” The New York Times
Again, it’s a ridiculous request to have the vast majority of men to analyze their masculinity. You’ll be ignored, and I for one thinks it’s a good thing.
Here’s the entire NYT article.